the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize