I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
