Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
