Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
