I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
