I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
