Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
