is your mom at the bar?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
