i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
