with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We are two peas in an std pod
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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