my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
The beer is more important than you right now.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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