my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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