If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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