if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
