I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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