So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
