The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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