is your mom at the bar?
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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