Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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