i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
What a dumb baby whore.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
