i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
