I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Is Oprah even human
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize