Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
