Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
