home. puking in laundry basket.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize