Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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