"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize