woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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