Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
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