Texts From Last Night

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  (905): View more from Toronto

  You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?

  (1-905): View more from Toronto

  Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.

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  (905): You had a beer at 10:30 this morning? (1-905): Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol. http://tfl.nu/apvz
  Replies (30) Good night (3742) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?

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  (412): Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option? (412): I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be? http://tfl.nu/cvc8
  Replies (82) Good night (2690) Bad night (474)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved

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  (386): Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved http://tfl.nu/rva0
  Replies (10) Good night (2817) Bad night (745) Order T-Shirt
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  (561): View more from Florida

  If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  Agreed

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  (561): If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet. (1-561): Agreed http://tfl.nu/8njb
  Replies (44) Good night (2821) Bad night (447) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  did we hook up?

  (925): View more from California

  no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt

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  (415): did we hook up? (925): no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt http://tfl.nu/pm3u
  Replies (30) Good night (813) Bad night (6287)
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  (925): View more from California

  no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.

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  (925): no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes. http://tfl.nu/3pwk
  Replies (13) Good night (5526) Bad night (510) Order T-Shirt
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  (909): View more from California

  Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.

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  (909): Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave. http://tfl.nu/ztn7
  Replies (22) Good night (1643) Bad night (3382) Order T-Shirt
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.

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  (928): Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting. http://tfl.nu/1dh0
  Replies (56) Good night (5505) Bad night (581) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that

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  (714): You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that http://tfl.nu/q1k2
  Replies (13) Good night (4559) Bad night (1123)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.

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  (360): Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk. http://tfl.nu/k2pc
  Replies (3) Good night (3861) Bad night (1081) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.

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  (847): you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after. http://tfl.nu/68kq
  Replies (10) Good night (1183) Bad night (4722) Order T-Shirt
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.

  (1-414): View more from Wisconsin

  That is like, the point of shorts

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  (414): Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard. (1-414): That is like, the point of shorts http://tfl.nu/qcbf
  Replies (5) Good night (1287) Bad night (704) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I was drunk

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Please answer

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  (312): I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex (312): I was drunk (312): Please answer http://tfl.nu/4zur
  Replies (16) Good night (504) Bad night (2442)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?

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  (281): Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again? http://tfl.nu/lpz3
  Replies (7) Good night (1473) Bad night (328) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.

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  (310): I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there. http://tfl.nu/gafs
  Replies (3) Good night (783) Bad night (233)

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