A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
