just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
