if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize