i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
