He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
honey bunches of taint.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.