I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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