Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
