I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
