oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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