She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
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