I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize