You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize