I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
