Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
sex in a hospital.. check
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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