She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
