she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
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I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
We left an ass print on the piano.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
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I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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