:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize