Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
We are all done wearing pants today
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
