it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
