Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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